A sililoquy by Abraxas

Call me cynical. Call me intellectually arrogant or label me just uncomfortably candid. After much contemplation and introspective analysis, I, Abraxas the All-Wise, have concluded that this world is led by sundry bumblers, bunglers and buffoons. And yes, in the midst of unbelievable technological advancements and innovations, we, the humans on earth, are now, in relative terms, more stupid and ignorant than ever. I say to you all that education is about learning, intellectual curiosity, and applying the things learned to better yourself and society. Today, education is a mad rush to insipid certification that drives, enhances and boosts a pervasive, arrogant meritocracy. The end result is the wholesale production of bumblers, bunglers, and buffoons all dressed up in $1,000 Armani suits.

This past February, as Black people celebrated BLACK HISTORY MONTH, politicians of all stripes were exposed as blithering racist buffoons spewing putrid memes, and calling Black people names that belong to a bygone age. As if to confirm their odious status as the political buffoons they are, an accommodating mainstream media, especially cable television, allowed them to “walk back their statements,” claim to have “misspoken,” and then had them offering full-throated, stupid, hypocritical “apologies” as if that suddenly wiped their racist slates clean.

And, dear minions, I, Abraxas the Powerful, do vociferously declare: Hooray for the great and magnificent Dear World Leaders with tiny hands! I now order you to all prostrate and genuflect yourselves before their Caravans of Nothingness and Nihility (not coming from the Southern Border) as you sing rousing and tearful hosannas of gratitude to the Great and Tremendous King Donald and President Forever Kim Jong Un for their rousing success in Hanoi. King D achieved exactly nothing, zilch, nada. So time for the great king’s fan club and legions of buffoonery to get to recommending the King for the Nobel Peace Prize to be jointly shared with President Forever, the Kim from Korea.

Ah, you who fall for all manner of hoodwinking and the antics of sundry bumblers, buffoons and bunglers, believed that King D was just about to ink an historic deal to bring peace to the Korean peninsula, and call an end to hostilities. I, Abraxas the All-Knowing did also get caught up in the euphoria of flawed expectations, and bought into the presumed outcome that truth, light, and Kim chi for all would prevail! Then things got bumbled and bungled and I, like many of you, felt cheated and shortchanged. Photo ops are not results, not diplomacy, and goes nowhere towards peace and reconciliation.

As if things could not get worse, we had a Maryland Democrat Mary Ann Lisanti finally confessing to using a racial epithet to describe a legislative district in predominantly black Prince George’s County. She’s been stripped of her leadership position and will take the usual crap of “sensitivity training.” Last month, Lisanti told another white lawmaker while having a few at a bar that when he campaigned for someone in Prince George’s, he was “door-knocking on a n—r district.” She must’ve been so wasted she’d forgotten to use the appropriate gentrification euphemisms like “sketchy” or “poor schools.” When she was verbally caught here’s what she said:

“I don’t recall that… I don’t recall much of that evening.” Yes, I, Abraxas the Great could see that – bar, drinks and forgetfulness. But things spiraled out of control and grew progressively worse. She entered buffoonland and bumbled her way to another stupid statement that is not only laughable but demonstrated a silly and idiotic pretense at stupidity. When asked whether she’d ever used the n-word, her response was both ridiculous and hilarious. “I’m sure I have…I’m sure everyone has used it. I’ve used the f-word. I used the Lord’s name in vain.” Then things got really, really stupid. Her public apology insisted that she’s the least racist person in the world and she has no idea how all that racism fell out of her mouth. Here’s her statement that I, Abraxas the Mighty, have entered into the Buffoon, Bunglers and Bumblers Hall Of Fame – First Class.

“I deeply apologize . . . for my word choice several weeks ago. I am sickened that a word that is not in my vocabulary came out of my mouth. It does not represent my belief system, my life’s work or what is my heart.” Oh great, words not in your vocabulary? Just fell out of your mouth like a candy you’re sucking?

And to cap it all off there was the Michael Cohen hearing in the U.S. Congress that went from crazy to bizarre. Had me wondering EXACTLY what these guys, Republicans, are on or taking. Have you ever really really needed to prove someone isn’t racist that during a congressional hearing you were eager and willing to make yourself look like a complete imbecile in front of the entire nation? If so please, please do not do what Republican gadfly Mark Meadow did. He (without a drum roll) trotted out a Black woman as an object of proof to validate that King Donald the Tremendous is not a racist.

Meadows who has embraced the illusion and falsehood that former President Barack Obama was born in Kenya, was very miffed at Michael Cohen claiming that the King was racist. So he went from fidgety glaring and feigned outrage to PROVING that King Donald the Dealmaker was really a very, very nice guy without a racist bone in his body.

Congressman Meadows decided to invite longtime Cohen friend and Trump appointee Lynne Patton who is BLACK, to stand behind his chair like a slave or a silly prop, until being told to sit down, “so they can see my face,” she explained to the Washington Post. I, Abraxas, the Intelligent, had no idea what was going on at the hearing when Meadows, obviously still peeved that his Lord and Master in the White House was called a racist, magic-hatted her from out of thin air, as she stood, looking very foolish, glaring at Cohen like he owed her money or sopmething.

“I asked Lynne to come today in her personal capacity to actually shed some light,” Meadows said. Honestly people and minions alike, WTF is the point of dragging some random black woman around to prove King Donald is all great and kind? I dare say that Meadows is definitely not playing with a full deck.

Here’s Meadows making his point: “You made some very demeaning comments about the president that Ms. Patton doesn’t agree with. In fact, it has to do with your claim of racism. She says that as a daughter of a man born in Birmingham, Alabama, that there is no way that she would work for an individual who was racist. How do you reconcile the two of those?” Oh, for Pete’s sake put a sock in it!

Why am I, Abraxas the Sane, surrounded by nuts, dolts, buffoons, bumblers and bunglers?

I just want to clear something up going forward; Having Black Friends and/or Family Doesn’t Mean You Can’t Be Racist.

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